Goals of 2018 – Seeking Introversion

When I think about my goals and where I want to be at the end of this year, I tend to break them up into sections which define the person that I am today. These sections can be things such as my goals for work, goals for lifestyle and my goals for learning this year. At it’s core though and most importantly, everything that defines who you are should always be in constant change, there is always room for improvement.

“The only constant in life is change” – Heraclitus

This is also deeply in line with the Buddhist thought that everything in life changes and that we must acknowledge and accept that for what it is. But that’s a topic for another day.

Today, I lay out my biggest ambitions for this big year ahead. I will in some ways keep it brief to allow movement and flow between one another. How I achieve these goals this year is another question and that is one where only I can deeply understand. For those of you who find it difficult to define the goals in your life or if you find my goals interesting, let me know and let’s have a chat, it would be a pleasure for me to hear about what gets you excited about life and what drives you day to day.

Every year I like to define my goals by an overarching line, one that I feel reflects the entirety of what I wish to accomplish. This year is defined as the title suggests; Seeking Introversion. To elaborate, I have always and will always be an introvert at heart. A few years ago, I sought to challenge that fact. It was hard for me to believe that just because of who I am, I could not love to talk to everyone, to socialise and feel energised, inspired and excited to do so. It is also known that extroverts are generally more successful in life, and it makes sense. In a world of ever growing globalisation and connectivity, there has been no other time in history that we are talking, socialising and connecting to one another more and more. Extroverts are highly regarded to do this well. Sadly, even with all the strengths that introverts can bring to the table, it is getting ever tougher for them to shine. For me this was really really hard at first, to come out of my “shell” as to say but over the years I have been able to overcome this only because of the amazing people I have met along the way and the incredible organisations that provide the means for me to grow! A few years later and here I am. I think it’s really important for me not to forget who I was and who I am inside; so this year I seek to look within instead of outside, I truly believe that there is strength to be found within the somewhat lost introvert inside of me and my goals will reflect that this year.

  1. Secure the job position overseas & prepare to make the move
  2. Continue learning the technical aspects of my work and continuing to manage larger projects of my own.
  3. Can play atleast 2 complex songs on the piano that require both hands, all while reading the music notes and singing.
  4. Reading goals – 25 Books & 12 NG Magazines by the end of 2018
  5. Writing goals – Minimum 1 public blog post per month & 1 private post per month
  6. 7 day Solo Road trip around Tasmania
  7. Complete a minimum of 3 courses including the current “Learning how to Learn” course on Coursea.
  8. Research the basics of philosophical ideas and practices such as Maslow’s Hierarchical of Needs, Roman stoicism, Yin & Yang, Introspection and ideas such as Marxism and capitalism.
  9. Complete the BIM model of the new house including furniture and special features
  10. Increase the number of lucid dreams attained to a minimum of 10. Continue to write in the dream journal with a minimum of 1 per week. Practice WILD method. Increase presence on Dreamviews.
  11. Continue the practice of Buddhist Meditation for mindfulness (the body, feelings, mind states and mental objects). learn about the concepts of enlightenment and nirvana.

This is the first time I have ever taken note of my goals so I am sorry (to myself) if they are all over the place, no doubt I’ve missed some here and there. In the meantime, I always have a to-do and to-learn list which is updated on a daily basis on Google Keep (which is so cool!), I totally recommend it.

 

Thanks for reading!

Beep beep Bop Bop

 

 

 

 

A Family Vacation

We used to fit a family of 5 onto a truck which could only hold 3.

I remember vividly my mum telling me to keep my head low and not to move a muscle. 5 years old, scared, cold and huddled beneath the dashboard of the passenger seat. A cotton blanket spread over me not to keep me warm (as I would have liked to believe at the time) but to keep me hidden as we were being smuggled across the city. I didn’t think much of it at the time, I still look back and wonder whether I thought it was “normal” to do something like that. In one of my earliest memories, I know that my parents taught me a valuable lesson; that sometimes you just have to improvise.

I remember my dad, with his body outstretched against the window nervously counting into the breathalyser, the sounds of mumbling, the numbers fumbling. I don’t blame him, how hard it must have been in a foreign country, a foreign language….with foreign laws. What were my parents thinking?! The nerve they had, the carelessness to do something like that. But even through all of this, in a twist of fate I realise that I am still here well and alive, their rebellious plan worked and our family did have a wonderful vacation in the end.

I wouldn’t like to say that the ends justify the means here because promoting this sort of law-breaking would just be wrong not to mention outright dangerous. But hey, sometimes things just work out right? :’)

P.s. Oh, and you’re probably wondering where my older brother, the 5th member of the family was. Well, he was in the back of the truck hidden in-between boxes of vegetables stacked head high. But hey, that’s a story for another day.

 

 

Paper Backs

If there’s one thing I could change if I went back in time it would be something you wouldn’t normally expect. Most people would look back to change a decision they’d made, to change the outcome of a certain situation or to regain an opportunity lost in time. These decisions usually change the nature of past and future because you want something to go your way instead of another. Maybe that is why a time machine just shouldn’t exist because of our inherent and selfish flaw to get what is best for us.

For me however, it is the missed opportunity to learn more about the world around me. It is the lost time that could have been spent reading the great minds of the past. What I am describing of course is the power of reading, the power of books.

Books were never cool when I was young. Stupid as I, and a lot of teenagers out there were, that’s all we wanted to be. Cool. So that’s what drove us, and when you have such a strong influence from the peers around you, you lose yourself and who you are to fit the social circle. Taking a step back I loved to read as a child, growing up with classics such as The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Possum Magic and The Rainbow Fish just to name a few. But the passion to read on and fill my imagination dwindled as time passed. I guess it’s not entirely fair to say that I stopped because it was uncool but I’ll stick with that for now.

Moving forward, books are now a big part of my life. Just like how some people forget their headphones at home and go crazy for the day, I also feel the same about my novels. It’s like an old friend that I’ve once again discovered, taking me to places that only a paper back along with my human imagination can take me.

Oh and P.S I have to confess something ~  There was a time that i was so taken in by a novel that I walked right off the train at the wrong stop. With a half an hour wait till the next train, there was nothing else to do but to continue reading on, undeterred by what had just happened.

 

Thanks for reading!

😉

Midnight Encounters

It’s 1am in the middle of the night as I slowly slip into my next REM cycle. I reach my hand up to scratch my chin, unaware of my surroundings, still deep in my sleep. Suddenly I grab a hold of something that felt of fur and 6 legged, it jumps out of my grasp and back into the abyss which is my blanket. Mind you at that moment I was still asleep and it took me a good few minutes for a signal to reach my brain and calmly say hey, did you just grab onto what’s most likely a huge freaking spider?! Eyes wide open, the heart springs to action like a mime who suddenly finds a mouse in his pants. The next thing you know, I’m off the bed, pajamas off and half naked running into the darkness.

It’s not my proudest moment.

I slowly gather the courage to creep back to my bed to investigate, carefully prodding the sheets for any signs of hairy 6 legged life only to find that I’ve been fooled. A cockroach sits on my pillow, greeting me with a smile. A smile that’s quickly turned to dust as i capture it and unleash my ungodly rage in a moment of what can only be explained as pure hatred for all things crawling.

I take a nice long sip of cold water, head back to bed, and with my teddy firmly in my grasp i close my eyes and let the adventure begin once more.

 

Thanks for reading!

Nighttyy night now ZZZzzz…

An Unexpected Journey

Imagine.

It’s 6:00 am on a cool Tuesday morning. It’s quite in a peaceful way and the air is crisp, waving before your eyes as you stagger it with your slow breath. Your toes tip as you make your way around the home careful not to wake the others, more importantly the alarm; the baby niece. There’s a familiar chill that runs down your spine as you step outside to the deck. The sun springing to life in the horizon sits ever so still through the mist that is suspended in time, an aura from the earth to you speaking the words good morning.

You huddle closer to the others on the platform. It’s already quarter past 7. Being so few in numbers, those you do encounter greet you with an amiable nod as if to wish you a good day. The train arrives right on time, unlike yesterday. You stand expectantly as it comes to a standstill and doors open directly in front of you. You board, with a subtle leap in your step, bouncing up the stairs, eager to begin your journey in your favorite seat – the two-seater four rows down on the right.

Reclining into your seat, adjusting for comfort, your open plan office is ready to go. The doors close and you take off leaving home behind. Several minutes have now passed and you take a moment to look outside your window only to see the sun has not yet fully risen above the forest tops. You see stretches of tall grass bewildered by it’s untouched nature and frosty tips, and beyond that, national parks and mountain ranges. And then you see adjacent to you the most exotic chequered suit. Who knew they could be pulled off so well?

7:36 am and you’re just over halfway. You’ve been sitting for a while now; the scenery has been replaced by aged buildings and the humming of city folk.  With each stop, more and more people board. The further you go, you notice each stop brings aboard more passengers with indignant expressions.

7:56 am and you’ve become engrossed in a page-turning fantasy, even though you promised yourself to get some extra work done. How did it even find its way back into your bag? A few more pages shouldn’t hurt. Your heart beats faster as the story’s climax approaches, only to suddenly jump as the train once again comes to a stop. This time, you have company. A passenger places themselves down next to you. That’s okay. You still have plenty of space, somewhat. They seem exhausted. This observation prevents you from being surprised when, just a few minutes later, they’ve fallen asleep next to you. No matter, I’m sure they’ve had a big week so far. You lose the battle to continue working and resume your thrilling engrossment.

Soon your quiet carriage isn’t so silent. A bellow is coming from the passenger next to you. Yep, they must be really tired. Their snores fill the carriage. No matter, you’ve come prepared and promptly place your headphones on and proceed to meditate, listening to today’s latest track.

8.26 am and you’re feeling incredibly relaxed. You’ve spent 90 minutes catching up on work, appreciating phenomenal inland views, watching the sun rise over the harbour as you cross the bridge, getting caught up in an author’s fantasy thriller and relaxing to your favourite music while your body wakes itself up for the day.

You’ve already done a lot with your day, so you’re feeling somewhat satisfied. You disembark from the train, leave the platform and enter the bustling city. And while your sleepy travelling companion begrudgingly follows, you’re content in knowing you’ll be doing it all again tomorrow. You’ve travelled 90 minutes to a job you enjoy, and breathe easy on the fact you’ll be travelling 90 minutes at the end of the day back to a home you love, but this time to the warmth of the settling sun.

What a daft thing to do indeed.

 

Thanks for reading!

Nighttyy night ZZZzzz…

The Draft

If you’re anything like me, you have more drafts waiting to be posted than actual posts that have been posted. Just think about that for a moment.

Does this happen to all of us? that I am not sure of. What is it that makes me hold back from posting a draft I’d made months ago? It’s a question i ask myself on a daily basis.

It’s just not ready I convince myself. There is always more to add, more too improve on! Whether it is a sentence made better by looking over it (for the tenth time), or a paragraph which should be removed because it was fuelled by emotions made too long ago, this is a constant battle between two minds. The Creative. The Logical.

As someone who has grown up in a an environment that seems to promote logical sense, it tends to suppress the creativity inside of me. I want to say yes when someone asks whether I am of creative or logical nature because it is just cruel to say that you are one or the other. We are all capable of becoming both and it is with that which makes us unique.

I feel that this is not just something that I struggle with on a daily basis so I challenge you to change your views on creativity. For the most of us, the realm of creativity is seen in the form of an artist or musician but that is far from the truth. We are all artists and musicians, we create sound with every movement, we express our own art in many forms. All we need to do is to answer with a yes.

So with that, are you creative by nature?

Firsts

The first word. The first sentence. The first paragraph.

These will never become any easier and if you ask me, it’s not easy now. I don’t consider myself a writer, at least not well enough to express myself creatively, as much as I do wish to. It’s one of the main reasons for starting this blog actually. There isn’t much I don’t challenge myself to do in this short lifetime I have been given, most of which are the life skills that will always stay with me wherever I go. Writing is one of them.

Growing up, reading and writing was never cool. You were a nerd if you read too much, an outcast if you enjoyed anything from novels to poems and art. It’s one of my biggest regrets now that I look back, and i’m not usually one to regret anything in life. I remember how back in much younger years I used to really enjoy poems, especially those of which that rhymed. Why did we ever stop reading and writing them? Or was I just blinded by societies grasp to follow what was cool at the time? I guess it doesn’t matter any more as time goes by, all that really matters is that to this day I still enjoy them with my Green Eggs and Ham.

For now I place down a marker, something to remind me that this is where I began, that this is the place of origin, my first post. So here’s to many more and hopefully, one day ill be a great writer of my own.

See you on the other side, my friends.